Stressed out over having company and cooking the perfect turkey? As these true stories from the Butterball Turkey Talk-Line® show, you’re not alone. This call center, 800-288-8372, has been answering turkey-related questions for more than 30 years and is open November through December. Butterball cooking videos are also available at butterball.com.

A disappointed woman called wondering why her turkey had no breast meat. After a conversation with an operator, it became apparent that the woman’s turkey was on the table upside down.

When a Talk-Line staffer asked a caller what state her turkey was in (meaning how thawed was it), the caller responded with, “Florida.”

One cook called in to ask how long it would take to roast her turkey. The Talk-Line’s home economist asked how much the bird weighed, but the woman didn’t know—yet. Turns out, the turkey was still very much alive and running around outside in the woman’s yard. Another hostess from California said her guest list included a vegetarian. She called to ask how to prepare a turkey so the vegetarian could eat it.

Last but not least, one home economist recounts the story of a woman who needed help finding a frozen turkey big enough to feed her large family. She asked the stock boy at the grocery store, “Do these turkeys get any bigger?” The stock boy replied, “No, ma’am. They’re dead.”

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